By the power of Alfie vested in me as one of the disciples of his church, I hereby declare this Alfie's thread. Brothers and sisters, let us pray:

Our Father who art in Ottawa;
Alfie be Thy Name;
Thy Cup will come;
Thy will be done in the regular season as it is in the playoffs;
Give us this day and stay one more year;
And forgive Spezza's stray passes as we forgive Leafs who trespass in our building;
And lead us not into the lottery;
But deliver us to Lord Stanley;
For Thine is a Cup run, the 'Hammer,' and the Glory, forever and ever.

Alfiemen!

Praise Alfie!

(credit: Steve McCarthy, Northern Ireland, apologies on the spelling of your name)